Michael, I think the important thing is not to lose hope. My brother had a death sentence with his stage 4 renal cancer and is now in remission.
The things to remember, in addition to medical care are nutrition, environment, love/family and prayer. The healthier he lives, the better the quality of life he will have.
Honestly, whatever form of spiritual faith and ritual you have is where I would start. Prayer ritual, meditation, or whatever religious/spiritual ritual is part of your faith will be calming to you. If you include David's grandfather, it may help reduce his stress too and help the family cope with what is likely to come.
It's not going to be easy, no matter what the prognosis, treatment, or end result is. All David can do is be there for his grandparents and parents. All you can do is be there for David and step in to help if needed. The family needs to make sure the doctors are managing the grandfather's pain and making him as comfortable as possible.
David, I will be honored to keep your grandfather in my prayers and hope that you get a miracle like I did. Take full advantage of advances in Western Medicine, but do not exclude the abilities of Eastern Medicine, especially when it comes to pain control!
You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers. If you don't take any of my other advice, take this: Make the most of every minute you can spend with him. Tell him thank you and that you love him every chance you have. You have a gift in that you have the opportunity to say everything you have ever wanted to say to your grandfather. You have the rare gift of doing this right so you have no regrets later on. Cancer stinks and I wouldn't wish watching a loved one cope with this on my worse enemy. But, take the positive from it. Cancer gives you the time to reconcile, to appreciate and to genuinely express your love and feelings to your grandfather. Talk to him. Have him tell you his life story. Journal it so you can share it with your kids and then with their kids.
I have learned that every day we get to spend with someone we love is a gift to be treasured. I never learn my lesson, so please, take some good advice. Don't waste a moment. Don't dwell on the bad. ENJOY EVERY MINUTE you get to spend with your grandfather. Have no regrets.
I hope you share many wonderful, healthy, pain free days/months/years with your grandfather. Don't give up. You don't know what tomorrow will bring.
I hope I didn't sound too preachy. This is all still fresh with me too.
