I have warned my kids (10 and 6) several times to clean the bedroom up, I always wind up having to do it because, they don't. I then warned them and gave them at least a week to make sure the room was picked up or they were going to lose most of the toys (if not all) in there, this was even after I already took out more than 1/2 of the toys they have!

Well, needless to say...mama just went in there and cleaned the room. I took out MOST of the toys and left books, a few cars, few dolls, little petshop, big dump truck, and couple games in there. I took out the playstation and VCR as well.

I don't know who has more of a broken heart...me for having to do this or the kids for losing most of the toys.

Please tell me I did the right thing, would you have done the same? When I was a kid my mother did this to me and it really hurt but, I eventually learned to keep my room cleaned up to earn things back.

I was going to take everything except books out of there but, I just couldn't bring myself to doing that when I started. I told them that if this tiny bit of toys and books cannot be kept cleaned up I will remove them as well. I doubt I would, that would be just too hard to do!

They are put away, once they start showing me more responsibility I Will start putting more and more toys back in there.

I don't get it...they are now in there playing the games I left and excited about the extra room. They were sad but, now happy? *Sigh* at least I hear them laughing now, lol.

Thanks for making me feel better everyone. I did another walk through before they went to bed and sure enough, they cleaned every game and lego (Forgot I left the legos and magnetics on the dresser, lol) up and put them away. They even went outside to pick up the balls and bring them inside to keep the dogs from eating them.

I really need to go through all of the toys before I start giving them back later on. I am planning a yard sale in a couple weeks, we don't have anywhere to really donate anything so I guess I can put some out there. Previously I mentioned that if we sold some of the toys they could take the $$ and buy either a nice new toy or something else they have been wanting so we will see. They do have wayyyyy too many toys.

They seem to be fine with everything now that they know they have to show me some responsibility before getting them back. I have also been trying to tell my son that both behavior and responsibility needs to be shown before he ever gets a cell phone or they get a mp3 player. He has been trying, really has. We had a long talk the other night during the storm and he told me he is trying to learn to control his temper, so we made a deal. He learns to control his and I will control mine (easy enough, all he has to do is listen).

My son knows he is almost a teenager and he is changing a whole lot. He tells me all the time "mom, I will be 11 this year and that means just a couple more years and you will have a teenager". Ahhhh, where did the time go?!

You know, they both told me the other day that they wish I had another baby.  I am done with having children though, I have the baby blues but, too many circumstances and medical issues prevents me from wanting another child as DS and DD are our miracle children. We found this out after we lost our middle daughter and they warned us that we had a 50% chance of it happening again, we couldn't possibly handle going through that again so as of right now I have an IUD.

I must be doing something right, my kids both want to go to college, they have brought grades up (A lot!) since moving here, I can take them to a restaraunt and they will behave, they say please and thank you, ma'am and sir, etc. I just need things changed at home more and I think we are all on the right track now.

Thanks for letting me ramble, sometimes I question my parenting. I know I have made many mistakes and trying to learn and build from them, I don't think it's too late.

It is SO hard to punish sometimes ~ when I ground mine ~ I feel like I am the one that is being punished ~lol!  But in the end it is for the best.  Go up to the school and just spend a few hours around the kids and you will see the difference so quickly ~ there are kids that just don't have any kind of upbringing.  What you have to remember in all of those cases is that it isn't the kids faults ~ it is the parents ~ PERIOD!  You care enough to want to make a difference and you will!  You are a good mom and you don't have to fit into a certain mold. 

Don't sweat the small stuff ~ they know that you love them!  It is easy when there have been problems to try to overcompensate to "make-up" for where we think we have failed.  We need to quit beating ourselves up all the time...just be the best Mom you can be!  You are doing a fine job!!!

          
You did the right thing – stick to your guns.

Well my heart is going to be broken soon, when I have to go through my whole house, and get rid of all kaileys old stuff, that I have kept for all these years. I'm such a pack rat.

Please tell me why I poo keep all these cute little toys she never plays with. My thoughts are, oh they are so cute, oh they might be worth some money, oh what if I have another baby someday?

I really need to get on with it. 

That's a great idea!  We take our youngest son's toys to Goodwill, but a women's shelter would be better.

And tiff, once you start you'll see how easy it is to part with the old stuff she doesn't play with anymore.  It's actually "cleansing" believe it or not.  Their room is clean and other little boys and girls get to share in the joy of having a new toy.  Youngest will actually give us the toys he know longer wants or try to give them away himself.  Last weekend he tried giving the neighbor kid his Gameboy Advance