Ever wake up to a cow on your back porch?

C

completelyme

New member
I did! Well, my back deck.

I could have reached out our sliding glass doors to pet it, but I didn't. My youngest said, "Momma, can we keep it?" :laughing: Mother said she woke up, went to grab a cup of coffee, and saw it staring at her through her kitchen window :laughing:

There are about 10 men trying to surround it and wrestle it back into the back of a truck. It's dodging them, making them run all over the place. Mother's out there going, "Come here, sweetie! :error:
 
not the back porch but the front. :laughing: we used to live on about three acres and the there was a bull in the pasture that was like a dog. You could pet it and feed it. It was really sweet. Anyway, woke up one morning to it standing on our front porch. This sucker was huge too. I cant remember its name now but we just keep pushing him saying go home and he did. The name will come to me later im sure. When I stop thinking about it.

miracle.... haha.. knew it would come to me. That was the bulls name miracle.
 
We've had cows in the yard. And we woke up with a dead guy on the porch once. He'd hit the tree on the corner, staggered back to our house and died. Until we got the screen fixed last year their was a dent in in where his head went back while he sat there and bled to death.
Between that and the mass murder this house really has some attractive features... :laughing:
 
Believe it or not...I have had several in my yard 3 times!! The first time was when I lived with Momma and Daddy...I went to sit down at the kitchen table and there was one staring in the window at me ~lol!! I had to yell at Momma and tell her to call Mr. Scott and tell him his cows were out! Then I got to go and help him round it up! I did that several times there ~ kids would cut his fences and they would get out and walk the street, but that was the only time one was in our yard!

The other two times were in the 1st year that me and Jimmie were married. We rented a house from a couple that owned several head of cattle and they got out twice that year. Not just a couple of them either ~ like a whole herd! All of them were in my yard. They decided that they wanted to go across the road and to another field and I had to go stand in the road at the top of a blind hill to stop traffic from hitting them ~ needless to say, there were more than a few presents in my yard!!
 
Woke up one morning to have a big mean bull staring at me thru my bedroom window...Apparently he got loose and became lost in the thick/heavy fog...He just stood there wailing away and crying..

I think he was scared and homesick...It was sorta funny to hear this enormous bull crying :cry:...I felt sorry for him but was a bit concerned as to what he mite tear up in my yard :scratch:...Especially since my Bright RED car was only a little 2 seater and I have always heard that bulls will charge at the color red...The bull was bigger than my car....Anyway I put the word out about the Bull wandering the countryside...No one came to claim him...And he eventually wandered off the the road...I later heard someone say who the Bull belonged to and it was the meanest bull they had that escaped!!! Well...SCARE ME!!!
 
Deer, bear, rabbits, foxes, horses. Never had a cow

I use to have a horse named Frair Tuck.

When I was little, my Mom kept blaming me or my dad that the vegetables would be gone off the table. I use to eat carrots and stuff raw, so I got the blame.

Long story short, Tuck use to open the backdoor with his tongue, walk in and eat off the table. He would hang out the backyard (mind you, we live on a farm, our backyard is a pastor), until he would see my mother leave the room.. and he'd open the screen door and have a snack.

She actually caught him once. Heard her screaming at someone in Mandarin. It was Tuck :laughing:

Not so stupid horse :laughing:
 
Not a cow, but several deer, elk etc. all the time :nono: And they eat everything.

Gardendeer3-1.jpg
 
Oh izzblizz that picture is beautiful! I know they probably get on your nerves and I understand, but I love that picture! What a beautiful house also!

We have many deer, possums, and raccoons! My sister had a family of raccoons that use to come up on her porch to eat ~ if she didn't leave food out the Momma coon would come up and knock on the door!
 
ping1970 said:
Oh izzblizz that picture is beautiful! I know they probably get on your nerves and I understand, but I love that picture! What a beautiful house also!

We have many deer, possums, and raccoons! My sister had a family of raccoons that use to come up on her porch to eat ~ if she didn't leave food out the Momma coon would come up and knock on the door!
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We have a raccoon who goes threw the cat door and eats dog food. I find him in the house almost every night during the winter. I've finally given up and put food out for him and the others.
 
Raccoon are extremely smart and cunning! They are not above climbing on each other to get to something that they want...my Momma hated them, they would climb her poles and steal her hummingbird feeders! She would try to leave out oreos and they would take them and then the hummingbird feeders to wash it down with ~lol!! I leave mine oreos and marshmallows!
 
ping1970 said:
Raccoon are extremely smart and cunning! They are not above climbing on each other to get to something that they want...my Momma hated them, they would climb her poles and steal her hummingbird feeders! She would try to leave out oreos and they would take them and then the hummingbird feeders to wash it down with ~lol!! I leave mine oreos and marshmallows!
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Not shocked. A few years ago, I had a bunch of folks over. We were having shellfish. It's early evening and I have a house full of people.

My daughter comes in and asks if she can have a few oysters. So, I shucked some and gave them to her.

Then she comes back and ask for EIGHT more. Ok, specific number here.. hmmmm.

I give them to her and follow her out the back. There is four raccoons sitting outside. She tells them to wait their turn. And they are all sitting there, awaiting her to feed them. She hands each one an oyster and when they are finished, gives them another one.

These are wild animals so I"m more than a bit nervous.

So, I bought out a whole tray of unshucked oysters and clams.

I SWEAR to you, they stare at the oysters, look at me and look back at the oysters.

So, there I am, shucking oysters for raccoons.

Can you say "sucker?" lol
 
gorgor said:
ping1970 said:
Raccoon are extremely smart and cunning! They are not above climbing on each other to get to something that they want...my Momma hated them, they would climb her poles and steal her hummingbird feeders! She would try to leave out oreos and they would take them and then the hummingbird feeders to wash it down with ~lol!! I leave mine oreos and marshmallows!
Click to expand...

Not shocked. A few years ago, I had a bunch of folks over. We were having shellfish. It's early evening and I have a house full of people.

My daughter comes in and asks if she can have a few oysters. So, I shucked some and gave them to her.

Then she comes back and ask for EIGHT more. Ok, specific number here.. hmmmm.

I give them to her and follow her out the back. There is four raccoons sitting outside. She tells them to wait their turn. And they are all sitting there, awaiting her to feed them. She hands each one an oyster and when they are finished, gives them another one.

These are wild animals so I"m more than a bit nervous.

So, I bought out a whole tray of unshucked oysters and clams.

I SWEAR to you, they stare at the oysters, look at me and look back at the oysters.

So, there I am, shucking oysters for raccoons.

Can you say "sucker?" lol
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That is so cute! They are wild, but they can make pretty good pets! They sure wouldn't have wanted to mess up there paws ~lol!!! Talking about lazy!!
 
Gorgor, if you had Snausages that picture would've been entirely different (I fostered some tame raccoons last year-thank goodness they are adopted now-they ate more than a 12 year old boy!-and they will kill you for Snausages)
 
tharedhead said:
Gorgor, if you had Snausages that picture would've been entirely different (I fostered some tame raccoons last year-thank goodness they are adopted now-they ate more than a 12 year old boy!-and they will kill you for Snausages)
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I remember! lol. I never did get those coupons I won or I would have sent them to you! :cussing:

The first week, David was hear, he came SCREAMING in with our daughter in his arms. Seems she was outside by the pond feeding the raccoons.

David's first words were "Raccoons who are out during the day have rabies!!"

I didn't laugh... too hard :laughing:

He's become a bit more hayseed by the raccoons still freak him out a bit. lol
 
tharedhead said:
We've had cows in the yard. And we woke up with a dead guy on the porch once. He'd hit the tree on the corner, staggered back to our house and died. Until we got the screen fixed last year their was a dent in in where his head went back while he sat there and bled to death.
Between that and the mass murder this house really has some attractive features... :laughing:
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I don't know whether to LMAO or cry :laughing: :cry: Were you scared, sick to your stomach, what was going through your mind? I can't imagine what I would be thinking or doing if I woke up to that, red!!! I'd be a neurotic mess!!

izz-that pic is breath-taking and so is your house!! That is my dream house!

We have coons that come out of our woods about every night. My mother lives right next door to me and one night when I was going home, I opened the door to step out onto her deck and a coon sat up and hissed at me. Talk about pissing in my pants...I did!! Ran back in the house crying like a spazz. It had been eating the cat food Mother had put out for the strays. I carry a flashlight every time I leave her house after dark to say the least.

My uncle used to have one for a pet. That thing was hideous. It'd hide and leap out at ya when you when you least expected. Little sheeit would get into the refrigerator and eat up everything in there. I hated it. He even went poopy in a litter box. It climbed up on my brother's chest one night when he was passed out on uncle's couch. Damn thing wanted his gold necklace so it started clawing at my brother's throat and nipping at the necklace. My brother backhanded that sucker off of him so hard it landed in another room...and then came back for more!! Hissing and prowling around the room the entire time.

But a coon makes a mighty fine stew!! :laughing:
 
Raccoons can be very aggressive and claw the crap out of you.

What is funny is my daughter has made them have manners. LOL.

She will slap the ones who bother her or hurt her and feed the other ones first. I use to have a picture of the 4 raccoons sitting and her feeding them. They rarely claw her or they don't get fed.

As far as a stew, I'm sorry I'm not that hayseed.

I usually eat at places that are much more on the high end unless I'm cooking at home.

I love foie gras so much. Unfortunately, my daughter is a huge animal lover and when she found out how the ducks are forced fed milk, she made me promise not to have it anymore.

sigh..... :cry:
 
Well, gorgor, high end for me would be Texas Road House or Applebee's. My in-laws took us to some fancy a$$ place one year and I hated it. I can't keep the silverware straight and the food tasted like ball sweat.
 
gorgor said:
I remember! lol. I never did get those coupons I won or I would have sent them to you! :cussing:
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I got only a few of the snausages coupons I won. Oh well, that is sweeping :)
Completelyme-around here it was pretty much, oh, there is a dead guy on the porch,we need to call somebody. :scratch: This is a very bad neighborhood. Just last month they busted a guy less than a mile a way with 18 Kilos of cocaine. That is a lot of Coke Sweepstakes. I never go outside without a shoulder holster on, even when I'm in my nightgown. I got pinned down by gunfire one time, and had to lie behind a dirt pile till the cops came. Damp and uncomfortable.
I love the cute deer picture :love:
 
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